As a barista, you meet a lot of people every day. Some are in love, some are exhausted, some are falling out of love, and some, like me, are still swiping through the murky waters of a dating app, trying to find a decent human being who knows the difference between a cappuccino and red flags.
I have already tried all the usual suspects: Tinder, Bumble and Hinge. At a point, it stopped feeling like a lookout for a date, but more like the speedy digital network with people who couldn’t commit to a drink, let alone a life partner. After one too many conversations that fizzled out faster than day-old espresso, I started asking myself: Is this it? Is this how we find our person now?
One night after my closing shift, while stress-eating leftover banana bread and doom scrolling on my phone, I fell into an online rabbit hole. It started with a YouTube video about arranged marriages and somehow led me to a world I didn’t know existed; Indian matrimonial websites.
I was fascinated. These weren’t dating apps. These were marriage portals. No vague bios. No “vibe checks.” Just serious intentions, star charts, caste filters, and profiles that read like resumes: “Engineer. US-based. Non-smoker. Vegetarian. Manglik.” It was like LinkedIn for lifelong commitment.
I clicked through Shaadi.com, Bharat Matrimony, and even stumbled on a niche one, Mudaliyar Matrimony, which I had to Google to see what it even meant. The whole ecosystem felt equal parts transactional, ancient, and oddly refreshing. People weren’t just looking for love; they were looking for structure, compatibility, and approval from multiple generations. It made me wonder if the Western model has it backwards. We start with chemistry and hope it turns into compatibility. These sites start with compatibility and hope the chemistry shows up.
I’m not ready to hand over my profile to a family committee just yet, but I’ve got to admit something is intriguing about a system that’s less about swiping and more about choosing.
So for now, I’m still making lattes and sorting through matches, both digital and romantic. And who knows? One day, someone will come in, order a masala chai, and tell me they found their soulmate through Mudaliyar Matrimony. I’ll smile and say, “You’re not the first.”
